We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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