I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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