You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
A white limo full of drunken 30 something business people pulls up next to me and asks if they can kidnap me until 1030. If I don't make it back tonight, call someone and tell them I died gloriously
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
