YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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