just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Of course I have a pirate flag
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
