I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Randomize
