Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
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