he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Randomize