You really coming over, don't trick.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
We had sex on a dog bed..
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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