I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Randomize
