you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
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