with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I just stole a conducting baton from the chicago symphony orchestra... i have to stop drinking on weeknights
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
My dick has a subreddit
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize