so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize