My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Randomize
