They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize