true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize