hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Drake has all the answers
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
