she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
I am eating deep fried cinnamon rolls and I found a lighter in my sprinkles. I miss you.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
