So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
