i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize