he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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