she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize