I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
grandma shit on top of the toilet
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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