ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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