It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Randomize
