once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
