In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
A guy from tinder a while ago who sent me dick pics straight out the gate is a tech on my dad's hospital floor. I was wondering why he looked familiar and why he never took my dads vitals when I was in the room
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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