hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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