all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
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