drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
