Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
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