I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
