Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
