I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
you never un-have a 4some
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
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