I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize