At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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