what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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