Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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