Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
Randomize
