Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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