well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
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