This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
