: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
My bed smells like the plague
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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