im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Randomize
