Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
Enjoy the penises
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
