whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize