I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Randomize
