Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
On my way home right now. I miss you. let's cuddle. whiskey.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize