oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Randomize
