1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Randomize
