We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Randomize